I Pay My Bills With Cash - Not Digital Products

Posted by Lisa Preston

December 28, 2007

Dear Aspiring Internet Marketer;

Thanks for the amazingly complimentary email about the quality of my work - and the offer you made for my services!

Earlier today I went down to my bank. I told them that I would gladly pay my mortgage by trading my services plus your digital products/ CD/ and private membership site for what I owe this month.

They called the security guard and escorted me out of the building.

Undeterred, I went to the grocery store. I filled my basket with everything I need for meals in the next week. I went to the check-out and made them the same offer.

They took away the cart, escorted me to the door, and asked me to never come back.

Still headstrong I went to a restaurant and had a fantastic meal. When the bill came I offered them the same exact deal. They called the cops, I spent a night in jail and now have to work washing dishes for 3 nights to pay off what I owe for the meal. The nice thing is that they let me have all the table scraps I can scrounge.

Please don’t take this the wrong way, but frankly, I can’t pay my bills or feed myself with what you offer. Eating digital products/ CDs/ and private membership sites full of products and services i can’t use is not very filling, nutritious or profitable.

Thanks again, but I think I’ll pass.

Sincerely,
A hungry and very pruney
Lisa Preston

PS - A bit of advice for those who try this tactic of emailing for free advice, design ideas, and ultimately attempting to barter services or products in exchange for design work: Be up front. It would save a lot of valuable time. There are dozens of forums and websites where you can post exactly that type of exchange - please use them! I’m sure that you’ll find outstanding designers there who would love to make a name for themselves in this way.